The Torngrens

2010-09-16T17:27:00.000-07:00

The summer feels as if it was over before it started. However, I love the fall. I love the way the air smells and feels. Crisp and fresh. Love it love it. As much as I dislike hunting season, I think it's cause I'm jealous, I wish I could go. Hike around in camo stalking elk, incredible. Not sure about the actual killing part, I get a little emotional when they go down on the videos. Kade recently like's to watch the elk hunting videos. Those and the a bull riding dvd we have. Animals I think in general have him quite mystified.

Sunday night was actually the first time he got up into a saddle and rode on a horse. Strange and totally crazy it hasn't been sooner they are in are backyard for crying out loud. Busy I guess. It was a little emotional for me. He of course absolutely loved it. Seemed so at home in the saddle. I hope that it continues. I myself am afraid of animals. I'm afraid of dogs and cats, in fact especially never liked the cats. But now I have a little boy that loves our cat Lucy and somehow I love her too now. In fact I kinda want to get him a kitten. I hope that he continues to love the horses and be brave. I want that for him. It inspires me to be brave and get back in the saddle myself. That is the deal with Kade, he brings out the better in me.

2010-07-13T13:19:00.000-07:00

This picture is from March. Not very recent, but hey look at me I'm updating my blog. So that's a big accomplishment for me.
I'm just listening to the awesome Idaho wind trying to bust my house loose from it's foundation. I'm sure I'm not the only one who is tired of this summer weather. If it isn't snowing, bitter cold or raining cats and dogs, its blowing. What a strange year. Thats ok though we've been having fun times anyways.

Summer lovin...had me a blast.

2009-09-15T12:39:00.000-07:00

GO USA, this was his fireworks outfit.

Trailing a little behind that's what his long johns say.

My new windows are going in as I type. I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. Me and Kade are downstairs trying to stay out of their way. We've watched the fifth season of the office. LOVED IT. I'm so stoked for this season. YES I shed a tear at the end of the season finale, geez back off. We have also watched a little baby Einstein and Kade is currently enjoying the rain forest melodys of his cadillac. This is what that looks like.

Yesterday after our room windows were done I just stood there looking at them, opening it then closing it. Open close, open close, open close etc. They did four yesterday until it started blowing and raining so hard. I can't believe the difference it makes. I can' t feel the wind any more when I stand by the window and I could hardly hear the storm when they were shut. Open close, open close.....LOVE EM LOVE EM.

2009-09-08T15:34:00.000-07:00

I have not updated my blog in a long time. I admire others who keep up with this and write such great stuff about life and family. I love to read about your lives and get up to speed with you. As for me I'm not as good at this. Wish I knew how to speedily catch you up to me if you so desired to know about me and the two boys in my life. So I thought maybe I would script one of my days and then leave it at that. Maybe that would give you a window into my life if you were at all interested.
0545 (a.m.) Woken by the squaks on the baby monitor. (Such a bitter sweet sound). Brandon had kissed me goodbye at 0400 to go hunting with his brother.
Fed Kade a bottle changed a diaper, turned off my lamp and let him go back to sleep for a while. I also went to sleep on the couch, I can't sleep in the same bed as Kade for many different reasons. Sometimes it happens and it's fun but most of the time I end up somewhere else.
0730 Laid by Kade on the bed as he watched Baby Monet and I got a couple more minutes of sleep. YES so lovely.
Changed more diapers played the usual baby stuff. Took a bath with kade, so fun.
0845 Put Kade in his cadillac and turned it on (His swing) He went to sleep.
Laundry time. Watched T.V.
1030 Abby (my sis) came over to watch Kade. Vahia Brandons friend came up and visited with us. He was staying the labor day weekend.
1100 Went up in the Hills with Bill and Jan (my inlaws) to pick choke cherries. Picked until about 1600 then we headed home.
1730 arrived home. B was home already. Kade was sleeping.
1900 Went to Cafe Rio for dinner. YUM.
2100 Put Kade to bed, B watched football, I went to sleep.
There it is I know you want to call Hollywood so they can do a movie bout the things rollin round my brain. (Did anyone catch that.....?? No? Counting crows song)
So there ya go kinda like a soap opera, if you haven't seen it in years just watch it one day and your all caught up.
Summers been great. Lots of gardening, yard work, hay and baby. I'm learning a lot about it all. I'm in love my husband and my kid we are living a pretty sweet life by my standards anyway. Catch ya up later, love ya all. Amy

Happy 4th of July!!!

2009-07-04T13:53:00.000-07:00

I wish I was out celebrating today. But Kade is taking a really good nap and I really don't want to disturb his slumber. I"m choosing a happy baby over a sappy one..(A Boo Hoo Hoo Hooing baby if you know what I mean.)
Bath time is so fun I think he is so cute all naked and playing in the water. It's so fun.

Aunt Abby is reading Kade a really cute book
my sister Amanda found. And so appropriate for Kade whose dadddy is a cowboy. Way Out West With a Baby. It's so cute and Kade just listens to it intently.

It's getting to be about time that Kade starts pulling some weight around here so we got him all dressed for a hard days work.

2009-06-19T11:37:00.000-07:00

Here are some recent pics, and when I say recent I mean mothers day. I have a lot of downloading and blogging and scrapping to do.
But I know what you are thinking, you've never seen such a cute little boy. I know I know I hear it all the time.
We are having so much fun. He has recently in the last couple days been grabbing his legs and feet. He just rolls up in a ball and onto his side. For a while now he has been sucking his thumb. Thats how I know he's mine. He may look like a Torngren but he sucks his thumb like his mom did. I hope he doesn't do it as long as I did. That was kind of an embarassing habit in college.

Please Vote

2009-04-14T11:34:00.001-07:00

Kade is kinda an amateur when it comes to his hair and he would like a little input from someone else more hip and with it than his mother. So please vote on your favorite do.

Pampers smell Soooo good

2009-04-03T13:17:00.000-07:00

New in town.

Sweetly sleeps that little boy. I am currently watching my little boy sleep and also some season 3 of 24. And by the way Jack Bauers daughter Kim is driving me insane and I am hoping that she maybe gets written out of the show. Also when does President Palmer ever learn that he should never talk to his ex wife. She also drives me bonkers. I also love that Tony was shot in the carotid artery, underwent surgery and is back at work functioning at a very capable level. It drives me nuts, yet... I can't stop watching it.

Look at that hand its huge. This is quite amazing that I am actually on my blog updating and putting some pictures on. I have felt as though I dropped off the face of the earth as we know it. But the last couple days I have really accomplished a lot. I am about finished with the third season of 24. I cleaned my kitchen last night. I paid a bill this morning. Brandon is home from work today so it's 2:30 in the afternoon and I actually have had a nap a bath and put make-up on. I'm doin pretty darn good. I have some great family and friends who have helped me out a ton. I feel pretty fortunate to have such a great support group. Plus Brandon has been so wonderful. He is such a good man. Last night I got to go to Shopko by myself and get some groceries. They are having a really good sale right now. The pampers were on sale so I got a couple packs of swaddlers and they smell so good. (Baby Good). And on the way home the truck smelled of baby powder and I just missed Kade like crazy.

2009-04-02T21:41:00.000-07:00

I am so in love with this little boy. He is the cheese to my pizza. I just love him so much I could eat his cheeks.

Kade William on the Scene

2009-03-19T12:01:00.001-07:00

Before and after pictures of me and Kade.

We went into the hospital for an induction on the 3rd early in the morning. I had great nurses, all my buddies. Great epidural. Man, those are fantastic, I was more comfortable then I had been my whole pregnancy. All until the pushing. Just a little burn is all......(Ouch) It was so different to be on the other end finally of my job. It was a good day, me and B had a really good time. Is that weird that we had a good time. It was just fun. They took really good care of us and we finally got to meet Kade William up close and personal.

However, coming home and being home is defenitely harder then the whole labor and delivery.

I never imagined how hard it would be.

Me and Brandon just can't believe how much we love this little guy. We just stare at him and go on and on about his toes or his lips or cheeks. It is fun.

And Brandon has been so good to me and Kade. He is such a good Daddy and husband. I love him more today then I did the day went into the hospital, I didn't think that was possible but alas,... it is.

2009-02-18T09:52:00.000-08:00

this is 37.4 weeks.

Some more pregnant pictures. Here we are 37.5 weeks pregnant. The other night I was feeling pretty sorry for myself because of getting bigger and bigger, feeling claustrophobic, worrying that my skin is going to split apart etc.
Then we had a "Fetal Loss and grieving" training at work. One gal that works in the NICU and another that works in Womens Center talked about their losses and their own experiences with losing their babies. Lets just say that we were all bawling our eyes out and I couldn't believe how selfish I was. I'm so grateful for what I have and I defenitely wouldn't trade my trials for theirs.

2009-02-18T09:32:00.000-08:00

Brandon and I moved into our first home about a week before chirstmas two months ago. We have five acres with I think 18 horses (not all ours), three cats (they belong to no one, I think they think they own the place), one dog (just staying with us until her new palace is ready), one long shed, one grainery, a tack shed, a hay shed, a nice yard and garden, several fruit trees, and a farm house. And we think that we are getting a baby in a week or two. Talk about baptism of fire. We are going to have our hands full.
It's been pretty fun to actually call a home our own after renting and living the single life before we got married for so many years.
B took some great pictures one day when it was snowing. This is pepper the dog and Skinny Jim the horse.

This is most of B's horse, Dusty is on the left, Skinny Jim and Snip is the mare behind skinny Jim. She is expecting also about a month after me. The other day while I was driving by the corral I stopped just to take a look at her. She comes walking to the fence by my car very slowing like she can hardly move, and looks at me with this look of misery only the pregnant could understand. I just thought, "I know how you feel Snip. I know how you feel." All except for that fact I sleep in a comfy bed and she has to hang out there in the snow and cold and her baby probably weighs fifty pounds more than mine.

2009-01-19T19:58:00.000-08:00

You Are Pocahantas!

Free-spirited and wise. You have a strong passionate spirit that touches and changes all who know you. The wisdom and common sense that you have is really what guides you through life. Even so, you also have a very playful side that loves adventure and excitement.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

Kade at 33 weeks and 2 days

2009-01-14T10:27:00.000-08:00

Ok so really it's not Kade, it's me getting more pregnant everyday. But, if you had x ray vision as many super heros do you could see Kade.

I have been pretty lucky I figure for this pregnancy. I feel pretty darn good, only minor annoyances, (Which I will still complain extensively about). It could be so much worse and believe me I know and have seen sooo much worse. So I know that I am blessed, But since I am journaling through my rage now, here you go. I have some very enjoyable pregnancy tendinitis. It is quiet lovely. Because of the fluid overload, the swelling causes my hands and wrists to swell and put lots of pressure on the nerves etc, causing some very unenjoyable ouchiness and loss of some fine motor skill in the good ole hands. It's especially awesome at night when I want to sleep its the worst, it burns like the dickens. And also at work it's nice when I can't spike an IV bag, or I am trying to start an IV. hee hee. Yeah I've been making a habit of telling my patients right before I stick them, "Now I want you to know my hands are kinda numb and a little jerky, so forgive me if I don't get this the first couple of pokes." Just joking I really don't tell them that. It is my little secret. And I still can get it on the first try so no one prego or coming to EIRMC fear. I got it all under control.

It is fun to feel him move around in there. B on the other hand I think gets darn near nausea if he has to feel my stomach or even see it move. The other night he was laying by me and saw some minor movements, and he just got up really fast and said in disgust, "What is the deal? Why is he causing so much trouble." He makes me laugh. Apparently the guy that can pull a calf out of a cow with chains isn't going to fair as well in the delivery room. I gotta love that cow hand.

Scout Master?...What?..(screaming) WHAT?

2009-01-13T21:32:00.000-08:00

This last weekend I was working. On sunday after my shift I was driving home talking to B on the phone, he seemed pretty down in the dumps. I asked him how church was. Thats when he dropped the bomb on me.
"I got called as Scout Master." Many things went through my head. My first response was, "Thats great...you are gonna be really good at that." In my head I'm thinking, "There goes my husband that I have enjoyed so much. It was nice while it lasted."
That was pretty crafty of the bishop since I was working and all when he called him, sustained him in sacrament meeting and even set him apart after church. I didn't even get to be there. Which maybe was a good thing cause I may have objected. I guess we have had it pretty easy coasting under the radar since we've been married. Never in a place long enough. No kids. pretty much we have been living the high life. Nothing to tie us down or demand our time, besides our jobs. Already I felt like mutual tonight was the other woman. Baby coming in a couple months. I guess it's time for the honeymoon to be over. How sad.
We truely have claim over nothing and no one.

Ode to my job.

2009-01-13T21:07:00.000-08:00

For anyone that may not know me or hasn't read through my blog I am a labor and delivery nurse. I love my job. One huge enourmous reason I love my job is because it makes me laugh sometimes. This may surprise you but there are some people in this world that aren't that brilliant. Me being one of them.

I want to give a little shout out to a gal that called me on the phone the other day.

Her: "I have a question, could I talk to a nurse."

Me: "I'm a nurse."

Her: "Well I am 38 weeks pregnant and I am already dilating. Is it ok if I get a bikini wax?"

Me: "Um.... I think that is ok, take some tylenol...I guess."

In my head,..."Personal preference I don't think I need to be in on this decision."

We all had a good laugh over that when I hung up. I told my compadres and Marsha a fellow nurse said, "You should have told her, "Oh yes please do, we prefer it." Yeah that would be great if some girl out there goes telling people in the community that a L&D nurse told her we prefer her to get a bikini wax. That would be just great.

We get some great calls. Some of the best come in the middle of the night like at 3 in the AM and a lot of times begin with, "Can I get pregnant if....?" and you can fill in the rest with pretty much any thing. Oh,....good times, it makes it a really fun job. But don't get me wrong there are plenty of other fun things too.

Anniversary.

2008-12-03T13:12:00.000-08:00

For our anniversary we went to the Black Swan and stayed in the Romeo and Juliette Suite. It was really fun. Again these pictures are from the phone,.. so not so great. It was a good anniversary.

2008-12-03T13:01:00.000-08:00

Tasting some lemon drink.

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There is a song that plays on Ayssa's dress and she would push the little button and then do a dance. When it the song stopped she'd push it again and it would start all over.

Tyson figures out kissing and chased Paige all over the house the rest of the night.

" Yeeeee Haaaawww" paige said.

These are just some recent pictures of this and that we just downloaded from our phones, so quality may not be so great but I figured some lonely souls in Memphis might have some interest. Sure miss you guys.

2008-12-03T12:29:00.000-08:00

Me at 24 weeks. This is the buck B got this last week. He went by himself that day and almost impaled himself in the armpit when he fell on the antlers trying to drag the thing out in the snow by himself. He decided to leave the body there rather than kill himself. This, his wife very much appreciated.

A Time to be Thankful.

2008-11-21T10:51:00.000-08:00

Today I am grateful that I have felt my baby moving. Excuse my moments of reflection and sorrow for a patient that we had in labor and delivery the other day. She was about 7 and 1/2 months pregnant. She came in with cramping and then came some bleeding. We stood in the operating room each of us asking God to make it right as the doctor searched with the ultrasound for a reason for the cramping and bleeding. The dreaded words came out of her mouth that she couldn't find the reason for the bleeding and she was afraid it was because the baby was dead. No fetal heart tones could be found. Anyone who has been present for that kind of news knows that there is no other sound like that of a mothers cry when she loses a baby. It is the most tangible, visible and audible breaking of a heart that you could ever witness.
As I have been thinking about her the last couple days it has become apparent to me that nothing in this life is ever ours. From the moment of conception of a child or from the beginning of a relationship with a loved one, it is only temporary. The catch is that the length of that relationship in this life is not known to us. Every baby, child and loved one is on loan from God. Just another reminder of how out of control we are. Time for loving is today.
I haven't seen my neice for five months now. My most precious memories of her were I believe given to me by a loving Heavenly Father who knew all to well the future. I'm grateful for those special moments we had together. We played barbies just me and her, and she told me some stories. We sang her favorite songs into the pretend microphone. She fell asleep in my arms and I got to lay her in bed and watch her sleep. She told me she loved me when I was running to get in my car to go to work. These are times I pray that she remembers in that little heart of hers. I pray that she remembers through these lonely times that she may have felt left behind that there is a whole family of love that never ends for her and it will never be gone it will always be here forever. I pray everyday that she will be given back what was wrongfully taken from her, her daddy and family.
"...I would gladly walk from here to you barefoot and bareheaded and half-naked to see you and think it great pleasure, and never count it toil..." Josheph Smith in a letter to Emma.

2008-11-08T09:14:00.000-08:00

A few weekends ago I went to a sleepover in Island Park with some BFF's from highschool. It was a blast. It's so great to get together after some time has past and see that we are still all the same girls. We always pick up right where we left off as if we never missed a beat.
Sarah brought baby Landon 5 weeks old. He is so sweet and adorable. He was having a rough night which inspired a late night Mylanta run, a little different from the midnight runs (Mormon versioned of course) we used to make in highschool. Val also brought her little girl and she just slept like a baby through all of our loud laughter until around 4 in the morning. Of the five of us that were there, three of us are pregnant. Emily gave us the news that her and Charly had a little surprise this last month.

Katy is due this month around Thanksgiving. Of course she just looks great, like she just put a beach ball under her shirt.

2008-11-08T08:43:00.001-08:00

I have been busy being pregnant lately. B has been busy searching for animals to terminate. (To keep facts straight this is a last year's conquer. He is still in hot prursuit this year.) I just recently realized that not all those feelings in my tummy were gas. On Monday I was at work charting and I thought something peculiar was going on down there so I put my hand on my stomach and something hit my hand. It was pretty amazing. All the sudden this getting fat and being sick "thing" started meaning so much more to me.

Lillie Love

2008-11-07T23:05:00.000-08:00

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what love's worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Some Halloween Super Stars

2008-11-07T21:48:00.001-08:00

Abby was Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas. Jacob...obviously was a nun (very funny Jacob).
The cowboy hunk is Tyson, our nephew.

Me and B traded places for the night.

Kade

2008-11-07T19:45:00.000-08:00

This is a first photo of Kade William. On Oct. 24th B and I went to the doctors office for our much anticipated ultrasound. The night before we went was one of the longest of my life. When I scheduled the appointment I purposely scheduled it as early in the morning as I could. I am 29 years old and this is my first pregnancy. I am an RN in Labor and Delivery and I am afraid that I have seen far too much.

Ever since I got pregnant I have felt a little stressed, I couldn't have a sweeter life. I have married the greatest guy and I am 23.5 weeks pregnant. How could my life be so great? To our relief all is well at the US. Kade has two kidneys, 4 chambers in the heart....etc etc. Everything checks out. We are very blessed. Although I keep having these landmarks in the back of my mind that I think 'well once I get to that point I won't be so worried.', I think that my life's worry's have only begun.